You know the old joke: where's the complaint department? On the roof. Here's a quick course in getting someone (anyone) to listens to your complaints.
To the question how are you? Never launch into complaint mode. Instead, begin with a compliment: gee, that color looks good on you.
Stop smiling and start complaining.
My back, my leg, my stomach, my scalp. You get the picture. Either you elicit sympathy or you don't. Always end with: well, it could be worse, and add your favorite phrase of luck.
You've completed the course.
Now students, you must listen to my complaints.
1. I tipped over in yoga today and was generally unsteady.
2. My orthopedist says that he wouldn't do a manipulation on my shoulder because my arm might fracture. That will be $50. Here's the name of an orthopedist in NYC (his father was Joe Namath's trainer) who is more experienced in complicated cases like yours.
3. Tomorrow is my final occupation and physical therapy sessions. My insurance company is hanging me out to dry..
Next: Advanced Complaning.